She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Found your dick twin last night
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
