I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Randomize
