ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
