I am in a vortex of obligation.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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