i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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