My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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