i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
