i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
