his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
