Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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