Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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