glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
