very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
