Dual....:-)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Randomize