Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize