we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
