i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Are we still banned from the library?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
