i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
