love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
