I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
