those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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