Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
