I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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