sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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