We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
