I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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