your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
