omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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