i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
jump out the window naked night went bad
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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