gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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