Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Can Purell be used as lube?
i barfeds in our rink
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
