the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
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