It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
