lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
