Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
A bitchslap is in order.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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