Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
