ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize