they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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