yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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