that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
wow bdsm is so cute
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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