dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize