his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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