I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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