Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize