you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
