Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
we should paint friendship bongs
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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