this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
