i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
