Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
