so that wasnt chicken after all
I think I won the penis lottery.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
