We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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